Forgiveness or Accepting the Olive Branch
John Gottman talks about the importance of, not only offering, but accepting the olive branch early and often during a conflict. He refers to these gestures, the offer of the olive branch, as “repair attempts.” They can be silly, playful, earnest, heartfelt. It doesn’t matter. They signal a desire to connect. Importantly, the way for these gestures to have a positive impact is for the receiver to accept the offer: to build on the joke (see “Yes, and”), to accept the apology, to soften.
This week, notice when you might offer a repair attempt and do it. Notice when someone has offered you an olive branch and accept it.
See how this changes the dynamic. Feel the difference in your body and in your relationships.