Savor: How to slow down

Watching a video of a stage play I did years ago, I was stunned to notice that I sounded like Minnie Mouse. On helium. I know this about myself, that I speed up, but to see the proof was a great reminder that one of my consistent communication challenges (aside from my handwriting!), is that I gallop ahead leaving my audience behind.

So many things can contribute to speaking quickly—anxiety, feeling like the content is boring, being type-A, going on auto-pilot. The end result is the same: we are not present, we are not connected to the other/audience, and we miss the opportunity to connect, lead, have impact, move others to action, change ideas, attitudes, and, importantly, to be moved, to be impacted and influenced, to learn from others and our audience. Remember, the best talks and presentations are relational.

Instead of telling my clients to “slow down,” I ask them to savor this moment by simply doing these three things:

• NOTICE the other/audience. Really take them in. Notice their expressions, the way they sit or stand, pay attention throughout the talk as they shift, connect or disconnect. Let ourselves respond.

• ASK ourselves, “Are they with me?” If not, we must go back, reconnect. Maybe we missed a rung of the ladder in our presentation and have left them confused. Maybe we turned on the auto-pilot and disconnected ourselves. Maybe they are tired, hot, can’t see us, can’t hear us. If so, fix it. We communicate FOR the other so if they are not with us, go back and bring them every step of the way.

• BREATHE. Every time we breathe, the audience breathes. If we do not breathe, the audience will find itself getting more and more tense. Breathing connects us to ourselves, to the audience, focuses us on the present moment, relaxes us, slows us down, and allows us to savor the moment.