There is an oft unspoken skill that performers seem to know, but have no memory of being taught. That is because this is something that we do not experience in rehearsal, only in performance: riding the wave of laughter and applause. We may not know what a certain audience will find funny and we are often surprised if there is applause during a performance. We expect applause at the end, but how to know the right moment to leave the stage? When do we come back for a second or third bow? We learn this skill only by performing before a live audience. Mid-performance, the skill is to ride the wave of applause or laughter and then, just as the wave begins to wane, jump in and continue decisively and with vocal strength. There is a sweet spot to hit that is somewhat intuitive. If we ignore the audience and keep talking or jump in too soon…Read on.

Here are a few things I always bring to events…Read on.

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I talk too much. I know it. Not all the time, thank goodness. And I also know my triggers: anxiety, being full of myself, having too much fun, and simply forgetting to include others. Dr. Jim Coan, a UVa psychology professor who studies the psychophysiology of attachment, associates over-talking with dominating. Yikes.

This week, we take note when we find ourselves talking too much, forgetting to listen.

And then we take these steps…read on.