High and Low Intentions For Everyday Use
Last week I wrote about high and low intentions for those in public service.
For those of us who are not in public service, our intentions may not be so aspirational, but the rule of thumb still guides us: intentions that are FOR others are high intentions; those intentions that boomerang the attention back onto ourselves are low intentions.
Imagine we are interviewing for a job. Or hoping to make a sale. It might be tempting to choose a LOW intention:
To get the job
To make the sale
To make them like me
To impress
To get their admiration
To prove how smart I am
Remember that we communicate our intentions, not our words! So the interviewer or potential buyer hears our intention even if we never articulate it explicitly. If that is a low intention, we all feel it and know it.
Ironically, using low intentions often has the opposite impact of our intended outcome and desire.
High intentions are FOR the other! They elevate and enliven the conversation. So when interviewing or selling, we might use intentions like:
To find out how we can help
To find a great fit
To explore possibilities
To make a connection
To learn about their company, their needs, their purpose
Low intentions put people off. High intentions pull people in. We all know when someone is bragging, showing off, needing our approval. And we know immediately when someone is deeply curious, fascinated, interested, open, wanting to help, collaborate, partner, contribute, learn.
That shift in orientation from ME to the OTHER creates a high and positive intention. We move from proving ourselves to learning, from desperation to collaboration, from bragging to inquiring. It opens up the conversation, builds trust, allows for curiosity.
This week, play with finding a clear, chosen, positive, intention that is FOR the other and let me know how it goes!